Leah & Clayton

'I'm a Survivor'

I have decided the song from Destiny's Child - 'I'm a Survivor" is my theme song for Medical school. When our families ask us how we are doing, Paul and I look at each other and chuckle and say, "We are surviving!" Medical school is crazy! I have no idea how Paul does it all- school,family, etc. I am so proud of him; last semester he honored in THREE classes! GO PAUL!! Leah is well, lets just say a 3 year old! Leah is sweet. She is always wanting to help, whither its helping me, Paul or Clay. Then the next minute she is stomping her feet and throwing a tantrum! I have to keep telling myself, Patience! Leah is now in Primary- CRAZY! I feel so old that I have a child in Primary. but then I feel so young because I remember being in Sunbeams. Clayton is a sweet, but ALL boy! If he gets in trouble he starts crying or when you tell him 'No' he looks at you in a very sad face. His favorites toys are remotes, tractors, balloons and any type of a ball(football, basketball and soccer). The past two days have been so nice. The past month and half its so been so depressing, fog and rain/cloudy. But, the past two days have been heaven. We have been going to the park(there is an awesome playground at an elementary school across the street) and both times there has been boys playing either football or basketball and he goes straight to the boys to "play". As for myself, I am doing pretty good actually, now that it is sunny. A group of some of my friends have been going to the gym every morning and it has been a blessing! There are 5 of us and one of my friends, Mckenna is a trainer and she comes with us 3x's a week to help us. I am so grateful for all the friendships that I have made here in Yakima. I really I have no idea what I would do without all of my friends, it truly has made med school A LOT easier. We all know how hard med school is and that our husbands are gone a lot so we just stick together!

'I often go walking'

Yesterday marked five years of my mom passing away. Five YEARS!! These past five years have gone by so fast, but yet so s.l.o.w. My family has gone through so much since then. My mom and I were so close, we did everything together. From going shopping(yes, I went grocery shopping with my mom in high school) to going to the mid-night premier of Twilight! I remember going dress shopping for Prom my senior year of high school and as I was trying on dresses and showing my mom and seeing her get excited about certain dresses, I remember trying to hold back tears in front of her because I knew she wouldn't be there for that day when I go wedding dress shopping. I sometimes get jealous of other girls my age who still have their mother alive and they do fun mother/daughter things. My mom wasn't there when I brought Paul home to met my family, she wasn't there when I got married in the temple, when I had my kids, when Paul graduated from BYU,etc. At all of these monumental times in my life, I ALWAYS have felt her in spirit. How grateful I am that the veil is so thin, so I can feel her at times when I need her. So to all of you girls out there who still have your mom, call her and tell her how much you love her. I would give anything to talk to my mom and tell her that. Also, tell her that motherhood is so hard and ask how she raised 6 kids and still battled colon cancer for 12 and half years. With Paul being in Med school, I really need my mom. I need my mom to tell me,"Jenn, keep going, you can do this!" I love you mom!

Visiting cousins in Tacoma and going to the zoo

"If Life Were Easy, It Wouldn't Be Hard" - Sheri Dew

I love this quote by Sheri Dew, "If life were easy,it wouldn't be hard." So simple. But yet, so complex in a way. If life was easy, there would be no reason or purpose for the Savior to have crucified on the cross. I guess, I'm saying that I am glad that life is hard, so I can learn from my mistakes and live with my Savior and Heavenly Father again! But hey, I am human and most days are hard and that I wish everything would be handed to me on a silver platter:) A few weeks ago, I was doing the dishes and it was a hard day for me. The thought came to me, "Why does motherhood have to be so hard? If it were easy there would be more children on the earth and more woman wanting to have kids." Right then and there I was overwhelmed by the spirit and had tears streaming down my face. The Holy Ghost had testified to me, that motherhood is hard so that I can lean and rely on my Heavenly Father, whom too is a parent and understands the hardships of a parent. I am so bless to have had this experience to help me every minute of every hour each day. Motherhood is not easy! I love Leah and Clay so much, I can not imagine my life without them. Paul is amazing! He is so great at juggling med school, studying and spending time with us. The kids get so excited when Paul gets home, especially Clay. Clay is such a daddy's boy. Once Paul is home, Clay doesn't want anything to do with me. I love that Clay looks up to Paul, every little boy should have their hero be their dad. Thank you Paul for being a wonderful father to our children! Leah has been stinker lately. She keeps me on my toes. Today at Wal Mart we were in the check out line, she grabs a Twix candy bar and runs away from me, which meant I had to leave Clay in the cart all by himself. I felt so embarrassed. I bet people were thinking, "That mom needs to be more strict with that child." I try so hard everyday to teach Leah to be obedient and listen to me. Some days are good and some days not so good. I sometimes feel like other moms are judging me and that if I did this or that Leah wouldn't be disobedient. I have to remind myself, that I am doing the best I can and trying to teach her to be obedient. 2 year olds are hard! I also, I have to tell myself she is 2 and to give myself a break. Did I say motherhood is hard?! Haha!

I feel my Savior's Love

Well I survived the actual first week of med school and I am on my 2nd week. I know Heavenly Father blessed me with a great week first week, so I could go onto this week, ha! The past couple of days, Clayton has been whinny and not sleeping at all. On Tuesday night Clay went to bed around 8pm and by 10:30 he was crying and not happy. Finally by 2am on Wednesday morning Clay went back to sleep. Wednesday morning I knew Clay was suffering from an ear infection, so I TRIED calling every doctor in Yakima! Every doctor office told me the same thing," Sorry, but you need to fill our a new patient forms and wait for a 24 hour process and for the doctor to okay the papers." WHAT?! The place I called I was crying, no one would help my son or me and he was in so much pain. I felt so discouraged and frustrated. FINALLY after what seemed forever, I was able to get Clay a doctor appointment in Mattaw, which is an hour away. As I was about to head out the door so we could make the appointment, my neighbor, Lauren knocked on my door saying she heard Clay had a rough night and asked if she could watch Leah for me. I told her we were leaving to the doctor, she said,"Let me take Leah." I told Lauren that its a pretty far drive and I wouldn't be back for few hours, but she insisted. Lauren saved me! Another tender mercy happened today. My friend Jayli(whose husband is a first year med student) asked if she could bring me dinner tonight. She has 4 very young kids and here she is serving me. The past couple of days I have felt our Saviors love for me as well as feeling humble. The Lord is aware of our needs and when we need a hand. This experience has strengthen my testimony and how I can feel my Savior's love for me. He does care about all of us and our needs. He knows when we need an extra hand. Thank you Lauren and Jayli for being Christ-like and serving me. Both of you have taught how to serve and be a true friend. Thank you!

Leah's first time feeding ducks

When we first got to Yakima, we drove past by this beautiful "park" and Paul and I both made the comment on how pretty this "park" is and how I need to come and bring the kids to play and feed the ducks. Well, we found out that the "park" is a cemetery, but you can go feed the ducks. Today Paul took the car, which meant I was car less. I thought it would be fun to run and push the kids in the double jogging stroller and we could feed the ducks. I told Leah we had to do some chores before we left and that she had to pick up her toys, etc. away. She did pretty good at listening:) The kids and I had such a fun time, I think I may have had more fun then Leah! I seriously could of stayed all day to feed the ducks. Here are some pictures of our fun morning: